purgatory indeed

I tend to reject most doctrines of the Catholic Church. Mary's ascension and perpetual virginity seems outrageous to me, the doctrine of transubstantiation is not explicitly taught in the Bible, and their view of salvation is off as well. The more I find myself in the wasteland that is the summer after college the warmer I get to the doctrine of purgatory, simply because if it did exist it would be right now. Here I sit, I am not functional in society. I am not experiencing eternal damnation nor unexplanable bliss. I bet there is no gravity in the real fake puragatory, nothing holding you down, yet nothing to fight against to reach the stars...at least thats what this purgatory feels like. Like prayers of my relatives I apply to "real jobs" and wait for my response from St. Employers, to see if I am good enough for their heaven of good pay and reliable benefits. If my resume is good enough I may be able to get on the top tier of employed heaven and get a job that would pay for grad school. The beauty of purgatory, in both senses, is that there is hope beyond my non-gravitational existence. One day, thanks to the prayers of my connections and the alms of my resume the promised land will call me and I will enter the glory of full time work, and having a sense of real worth. Till then I shall float along the seemingly endless nothingness hoping and waiting.
PS I really dont believe in purgatory.